Jeff Hinton (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
lastfirstkiss) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
muserevival2016-07-17 11:12 am
lastfirstkiss) wrote in muserevival2016-07-17 11:12 am
124.3 || First Person Private
I got a feeling
The last thing in the world you really expect to see when you're going for a job interview meeting thingie with your friend/dude you had a crush on's boss is to see said dude you had a crush on giving another dude a really hot kiss in the hallway of the hospital. I mean, granted, it was a really hot kiss, and it's not like I thought I had a chance with Rhys anyways. I mean, I blew it. I keep blowing it. With everybody, and I don't understand why I can't seem to get my shit together. But then there's the whole thing where the dude he was kissing was Miles, which is his BFF and his roommate.
I'm not gonna lie, I've always been one of those dudes who treasures my BFFs, but in the last few months, I've made a royal mess of trying to show it. Richie and I nearly fell completely apart, he moved out and I've been trying to pick the pieces up there. And it feels like it's been a million years since I last saw Niko. I know it hasn't really been that long. I mean... He's not even that far away, but he's head down, ass up studying. But he's been on my mind so much lately that it's been weird.
And then I see Rhys with Miles. Best friends. And I'd be an idiot not to wonder if it can work. I mean, without fucking up the friendship, without losing one of the people who means the most to you in the world. I don't have the best track record of not fucking things up with people I try to date. Or with my friends. And when it comes to dating your best friend, you can't afford to blow it. Everyone surrounding me has sort of met someone, started dating, then fell for them in that order. But Rhys and Miles looked pretty damn cozy today, and it was sweet to see. I don't want to jump the gun and take it to heart too much, but they just fucking looked so happy.
Can it work? Dating your best friend? Falling in love with them? Or is it doomed to fail and hurt that much more because you lost your friend and your partner? I don't even know the answer, and thinking about it gives me this weird twist in my gut. I don't want to think about it too much, but part of me feels like I have to before I fuck up again.
The last thing in the world you really expect to see when you're going for a job interview meeting thingie with your friend/dude you had a crush on's boss is to see said dude you had a crush on giving another dude a really hot kiss in the hallway of the hospital. I mean, granted, it was a really hot kiss, and it's not like I thought I had a chance with Rhys anyways. I mean, I blew it. I keep blowing it. With everybody, and I don't understand why I can't seem to get my shit together. But then there's the whole thing where the dude he was kissing was Miles, which is his BFF and his roommate.
I'm not gonna lie, I've always been one of those dudes who treasures my BFFs, but in the last few months, I've made a royal mess of trying to show it. Richie and I nearly fell completely apart, he moved out and I've been trying to pick the pieces up there. And it feels like it's been a million years since I last saw Niko. I know it hasn't really been that long. I mean... He's not even that far away, but he's head down, ass up studying. But he's been on my mind so much lately that it's been weird.
And then I see Rhys with Miles. Best friends. And I'd be an idiot not to wonder if it can work. I mean, without fucking up the friendship, without losing one of the people who means the most to you in the world. I don't have the best track record of not fucking things up with people I try to date. Or with my friends. And when it comes to dating your best friend, you can't afford to blow it. Everyone surrounding me has sort of met someone, started dating, then fell for them in that order. But Rhys and Miles looked pretty damn cozy today, and it was sweet to see. I don't want to jump the gun and take it to heart too much, but they just fucking looked so happy.
Can it work? Dating your best friend? Falling in love with them? Or is it doomed to fail and hurt that much more because you lost your friend and your partner? I don't even know the answer, and thinking about it gives me this weird twist in my gut. I don't want to think about it too much, but part of me feels like I have to before I fuck up again.