Emily Michelle Cole (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
emilywhereverimayfindher) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
muserevival2016-09-22 06:47 pm
emilywhereverimayfindher) wrote in muserevival2016-09-22 06:47 pm
Entry tags:
127.7 : Tumblr Quotes
"We were born to be real, not perfect."
Angela and Emily had planned to take Ainsley out today to the Harry Potter Studios. It was one of the main perks of the trip for him, and he was psyched to share it with the two of them. But when the day came, and an excited Ainsley was ready to get going, Emily found that she was feeling pretty awful. She refused to let Ange and Ains miss out on a good time together, though, and told them both to go and have a blast together. Her plan was just to stay in and rest for a while, and hopefully feel a bit better later on in the day.
Ange and Ains had been gone just about an hour when things started to change, though. Emily started to experience the equivalent of severe period cramps, and that, she knew, wasn't normal when she was pregnant. Barely pregnant, but pregnant nonetheless. The pregnancy had to be terminated either way if she wanted to start her treatments for cancer. But it was still hard to face up to in a way. But with the way her body was acting at this point, maybe it wasn't going to be left to her to decide anyway. She couldn't be sure, but she wasn't ruling anything out yet.
That was how she ended up a nervous wreck, not wanting to call and interrupt Ange and Ains's day at Harry Potter, but also not wanting to be alone if there was anything wrong. It was only when she made a trip to the restroom that she knew... there was bleeding. There was a high likelihood that she was miscarrying, and even though this was ultimately the outcome that they were going to have to go with, it was still a bit of a shock to the system, and a hard thing to face.
It all came down to a decision, and Emily grabbed her cell phone, immediately calling her twin. When he answered the phone, she very softly, much more calmly than she felt, told him, "Linc... I think I'm losing the baby. Ange took Ains to Harry Potter, and I think I need to go to the hospital to make sure that I'm okay. Can... Can you take me?"
"I'm coming," he told her, and just like that, he was at the door of her hotel room knocking. This trip had been such a beautiful experience, full of hope and healing for Emily. She'd married the love of her life, and reconnected with her twin brother... something she'd begun to think would take a fucking miracle.
It was her twin who took her to the hospital, who stayed by her side and held her hand as the ultrasound was completed and the doctor told her that the pregnancy was over. It surprised her that it still hurt, even though she knew it was for the best, but that was sort of how feelings always tended to work. Never quite in the way you expected.
The doctor explained that she would be able to go back home -- it was early enough in the pregnancy that losing it would effectively be like a really heavy period that she would have to wait out. If she experienced unusual pain, or the bleeding hadn't stopped in two weeks, she needed to be seen again to ensure that nothing out of the ordinary occurred. She was grateful for that. Grateful that she wasn't going to be spending the rest of their time in London in a hospital bed.
Her twin took her back to the hotel and settled her in, and he stayed with her for a while, knowing that she didn't want to be alone. He didn't have to ask. He knew. At the end of the day, after all that they'd been through together, and all the hurt between them, Linc still knew his sister. She got settled into the bed, and Linc lay down on the other side, taking her hand again so she'd know that he was there, he wasn't leaving, and she wasn't alone.
"It's funny," she finally said. "I knew all along that this was the answer. Whether I had to do it, or it happened naturally. I can't treat my cancer as long as I'm pregnant. I couldn't keep this pregnancy going. It hurts to lose it, but on the other hand, it... It feels like life telling me that it's okay. It's okay to take care of myself. Life handled the hardest decision for me. I mean... the decision was already made. I was going to terminate the pregnancy anyway. But this way, it happened on its own. I didn't have to do it myself. Is that stupid?"
Linc shook his head and gave Em's hand a gentle squeeze. "No. Not stupid. What would be stupid is if you weren't going to have the treatments you needed at all. That would be incredibly stupid, and I'd tell you to your face. Repeatedly."
"I have no doubt of that," Emily replied with a tired smile. "Linc?" she said softly, turning to look at him... a face so like her own. "Thank you for coming. Thank you for being here with me."
"That's kind of how it's supposed to be, isn't it?" Linc asked, a hint of sharpness to his tone that reminded her that she had not been there when he needed her to be, but a stroke of his thumb against her hand letting her know that forgiveness was there, and so was the love that had carried them through so much. "We're family, Em. I don't want us to forget that again."
Emily nodded gratefully, her head shifting to rest against her twin's shoulder. "I love you, Linc. For all my fail, I'm so glad you're my brother."
"Bitch, please," he retorted, a smile spreading despite the tears in his eyes... It was one hell of an emotional trip. That was for sure. "You make me cry, and I'm going to sic Clint on you."
Emily answered that with a playful eyeroll and a kiss on her brother's cheek, thankful for his sense of humor when she was in a rough place. "Hey, what's the point in being married to a rough bitch if you can't sic him on your twin sometimes?"
Link isimtoofabulous and is used with love and permission
Angela and Emily had planned to take Ainsley out today to the Harry Potter Studios. It was one of the main perks of the trip for him, and he was psyched to share it with the two of them. But when the day came, and an excited Ainsley was ready to get going, Emily found that she was feeling pretty awful. She refused to let Ange and Ains miss out on a good time together, though, and told them both to go and have a blast together. Her plan was just to stay in and rest for a while, and hopefully feel a bit better later on in the day.
Ange and Ains had been gone just about an hour when things started to change, though. Emily started to experience the equivalent of severe period cramps, and that, she knew, wasn't normal when she was pregnant. Barely pregnant, but pregnant nonetheless. The pregnancy had to be terminated either way if she wanted to start her treatments for cancer. But it was still hard to face up to in a way. But with the way her body was acting at this point, maybe it wasn't going to be left to her to decide anyway. She couldn't be sure, but she wasn't ruling anything out yet.
That was how she ended up a nervous wreck, not wanting to call and interrupt Ange and Ains's day at Harry Potter, but also not wanting to be alone if there was anything wrong. It was only when she made a trip to the restroom that she knew... there was bleeding. There was a high likelihood that she was miscarrying, and even though this was ultimately the outcome that they were going to have to go with, it was still a bit of a shock to the system, and a hard thing to face.
It all came down to a decision, and Emily grabbed her cell phone, immediately calling her twin. When he answered the phone, she very softly, much more calmly than she felt, told him, "Linc... I think I'm losing the baby. Ange took Ains to Harry Potter, and I think I need to go to the hospital to make sure that I'm okay. Can... Can you take me?"
"I'm coming," he told her, and just like that, he was at the door of her hotel room knocking. This trip had been such a beautiful experience, full of hope and healing for Emily. She'd married the love of her life, and reconnected with her twin brother... something she'd begun to think would take a fucking miracle.
It was her twin who took her to the hospital, who stayed by her side and held her hand as the ultrasound was completed and the doctor told her that the pregnancy was over. It surprised her that it still hurt, even though she knew it was for the best, but that was sort of how feelings always tended to work. Never quite in the way you expected.
The doctor explained that she would be able to go back home -- it was early enough in the pregnancy that losing it would effectively be like a really heavy period that she would have to wait out. If she experienced unusual pain, or the bleeding hadn't stopped in two weeks, she needed to be seen again to ensure that nothing out of the ordinary occurred. She was grateful for that. Grateful that she wasn't going to be spending the rest of their time in London in a hospital bed.
Her twin took her back to the hotel and settled her in, and he stayed with her for a while, knowing that she didn't want to be alone. He didn't have to ask. He knew. At the end of the day, after all that they'd been through together, and all the hurt between them, Linc still knew his sister. She got settled into the bed, and Linc lay down on the other side, taking her hand again so she'd know that he was there, he wasn't leaving, and she wasn't alone.
"It's funny," she finally said. "I knew all along that this was the answer. Whether I had to do it, or it happened naturally. I can't treat my cancer as long as I'm pregnant. I couldn't keep this pregnancy going. It hurts to lose it, but on the other hand, it... It feels like life telling me that it's okay. It's okay to take care of myself. Life handled the hardest decision for me. I mean... the decision was already made. I was going to terminate the pregnancy anyway. But this way, it happened on its own. I didn't have to do it myself. Is that stupid?"
Linc shook his head and gave Em's hand a gentle squeeze. "No. Not stupid. What would be stupid is if you weren't going to have the treatments you needed at all. That would be incredibly stupid, and I'd tell you to your face. Repeatedly."
"I have no doubt of that," Emily replied with a tired smile. "Linc?" she said softly, turning to look at him... a face so like her own. "Thank you for coming. Thank you for being here with me."
"That's kind of how it's supposed to be, isn't it?" Linc asked, a hint of sharpness to his tone that reminded her that she had not been there when he needed her to be, but a stroke of his thumb against her hand letting her know that forgiveness was there, and so was the love that had carried them through so much. "We're family, Em. I don't want us to forget that again."
Emily nodded gratefully, her head shifting to rest against her twin's shoulder. "I love you, Linc. For all my fail, I'm so glad you're my brother."
"Bitch, please," he retorted, a smile spreading despite the tears in his eyes... It was one hell of an emotional trip. That was for sure. "You make me cry, and I'm going to sic Clint on you."
Emily answered that with a playful eyeroll and a kiss on her brother's cheek, thankful for his sense of humor when she was in a rough place. "Hey, what's the point in being married to a rough bitch if you can't sic him on your twin sometimes?"
Link is
imtoofabulous and is used with love and permission