059.1

[icame2win]

"In the dark of the night
Those small hours, uncertain and anxious
I need to call you
Rooms full of strangers, some call me friend
But I wish you were so close to me."
By Your Side, INXS


When Isaac had come to in the hospital, only Scott’s mom had been there. Mrs. McCall had become a sort of group mother to their whole group of friends, which was particularly special to the three of them (Stiles, Isaac, and Allison) who were without their own mothers. She was always there with a hug and an ear to listen, and Isaac would never take that for granted or fail to be grateful for it. But it didn’t change the fact that when he woke up, still pretty out of it, and seeing no face near him but Mrs. McCall’s, he could only think of one person. Stiles. It had taken him more than a few minutes to get himself to the point that he could speak, but when he did, it was only to call Stiles’ name.

Melissa had just shaken her head, giving Isaac’s arm a gentle pat that was much less painful now that his werewolf healing had set in and healed the burns there. He was out of it, but as he regained his strength in the hours afterward, it was with a focus on Stiles. As his ability to speak coherently had come back to him, he’d immediately started questioning Melissa, and the answers were the hardest thing to hear. Stiles was gone. Not gone physically, but the person who’d been there before wasn’t there anymore. There was something evil walking around with the face that Isaac used to wake up to when things were good – something dark and twisted using the hands that used to touch him so gently and nervously. The memories of the good times that they shared, from first coming to the realization that they had feelings for each other, to sharing their first kiss, seemed somehow tainted in knowing that the Stiles with whom they’d all happened wasn’t the person that was in his body right now.

It was only a matter of hours later, thanks to Isaac’s healing speeding up things quickly, before he was again surrounded by his friends, but none of it seemed to matter without Stiles. It wasn’t enough, as they all joined together under the darkness of the night, all hoping like hell to find their friend and somehow save him from the evil that had taken hold. But Isaac couldn’t fully participate in the conversation, and more than anything, he wanted to just sit alone for hours and bawl his eyes out. But tonight, that wasn’t an option. No matter how much he might be wishing that Stiles were here beside him, it wasn’t happening. Stiles was gone, maybe forever, but until they knew that for sure, they would all fight to their last breath to find him and save him. In the darkness, as Scott explained what was going to happen next, Isaac felt a very small hand slip into his, and turned to see Lydia, giving his hand a soft squeeze and giving him her best attempt at a reassuring smile. It was weak at best, but there was comfort in it for Isaac, who squeezed her hand back, even as he caught Lydia shooting a death glare at Allison, who was for all the world trying to get Isaac’s attention. Tonight, Isaac didn’t even have it in him to try and hide how he felt about Stiles anymore, so he clung that little bit tighter to Lydia’s hand, even as he steeled himself for what might be the hardest thing he’d ever faced.


Isaac Lahey, Teen Wolf

Comments

[imsomething]

Lydia just came up beside Isaac and silently sat down beside him. She sat there quietly for a few moments, and she had told herself she wouldn't be a pushy bitch, but after a moment, she wrapped her arms around him in a gentle hug.

[icame2win]

The rest of the group had spread out, Scott seeming to understand that Isaac needed Lydia right now. So when he'd divided them up into groups, despite Allison's all but insistence that she be with Isaac, Scott had told her quickly and succinctly that she would go with him and the twins. And it was a good thing, too, because once Lydia and Isaac were alone, he couldn't hold it back anymore. His arms went gratefully around the redhead, and he let out a choked sob as he buried his face in her shoulder.

[imsomething]

She wanted to give him all the reassurances. She wanted to give him all the awesome words, and promise him Stiles would be find. If only it had been like the mess with Jackson and a good snog was the answer to snapping him out of the evil invasion. That would be what Isaac was wishing was the answer, no doubt about it. But as one of the only ones who knew how connected to Stiles Isaac was, she felt like it was her job to be there. Allison could just move to the side and stay there. She nursed the back of his head with her hand and dropped the other one to rub his back.

[icame2win]

Isaac felt like he couldn't even catch his breath. It was as if he had giant boulders piled on his chest, mixed with that same panicked feeling he'd gotten all those months ago in that hotel with the hallucinations of being locked away again. He was terrified, and nothing could make this right because none of them knew for sure what they were dealing with. Nogitsune. It was nothing they'd dealt with before, and they had no way of knowing if Stiles was even still there inside his body. "I wasn't there..." he gasped. "I wasn't... I couldn't... He needed me. I... I need him." It wasn't making sense, and coming out in disjointed gasps for air, but Isaac was doing his damnedest to try to at least explain a little.

[imsomething]

"Hey, hey, hey," Lydia said quickly, grabbing his hand to give it a soft squeeze. "This thing, it's more powerful than any of us. There's nothing you could have done to stop it. It picked him because he was the easiest target. You can't blame yourself. You need to try to keep it together because you're connected to Stiles... you need to stay strong, Isaac," she urged, watching him closely and yes, desperately.

Then softly, as an afterthought knowing how Stiles had been lately. "He hasn't been himself since the ice bath. You know that, right?"

[icame2win]

Isaac's heartbroken tears only relented a little as Lydia did the best she could to calm him. He was falling apart, and he knew that she was right. Stiles needed him to be strong. He needed him to hold it together when it felt for all the world like he just couldn't. "If it's more powerful than us, how the hell are we going to save him?" he asked softly.

"I know," Isaac replied. "The whole time after all of that, I wanted him close to me. I needed to protect him. But I couldn't protect him from this. I couldn't save him."

[imsomething]

Lydia pursed her lips helplessly, wishing she had a batter answer than the one she was going to give. "We're... working on it. Sort of. We just don't know what we're supposed to be working on. But on the upside, everyone is working on it. Scott, Scott's mom, Stiles and Allison's dads, Derek, the twins, Kira and her parents, who know more about this than we do. But Stiles... we think this thing has taken over completely now. Maybe has all along. It's a trickster. It's fooled all of us, at all the things we thought were our strengths, it used them against us."

"It looks likes Stiles, so we trusted to easily. Now we just have to be more aware, and fight as a team," she explained and then sighed, shaking her head a little. "It's impossible to know if he's still in there though. You look at him, in the face, in the eye, it's not him. His voice doesn't even sound the same."

[icame2win]

It was one of the hardest things in the world to accept that Stiles, whom Isaac adored... the first guy he'd ever shared so many amazing things with -- things like cuddling and watching movies, or spooning, or showering together, all of those amazing things that meant so much to him -- was gone. At least for now. Whatever this thing was, it was Stiles' body, but nothing else of him. The thought that Stiles could really be gone forever was enough to make Isaac feel like throwing up. "They're all working on it, but you know as well as I do that Allison's dad would kill Stiles if it was the only way to stop the Nogitsune. And what if it is? What if we... we can't..." He waved his hand in the air sort of aimlessly, because he just couldn't bring himself to say it out loud. What if we can't save him?

"We have to get him back," Isaac said firmly. "Stiles isn't dead. He can't be." The words were spoken with a confidence that Isaac didn't quite feel, but he stood behind them just the same. "I understand this whole thing is a mess. It's the way things are in Beacon Hills. But Stiles... we were all supposed to protect him. He's... He's not a werewolf or anything else, but he's the heart and soul of us all."

[imsomething]

Lydia just caught her lower lip between her teeth. "I don't really know much of anything anymore," she admitted to him quietly. "I never really knew Allison's dad that well. Lately, I'm not even very close to Allison. She's kind of one-tracked minded, you know? I can never seem to tell if she's trying to get Scott back or punish him for not taking her back. But this isn't about her. At all. All we know is that whatever way we try, there's no guarantee it will work."

Her arm was still around him and she rubbed his arm. "I know this isn't easy for you. No one really knows about you guys, and you never got to the point of figuring out if you want them to know. Then all of a sudden, he's acting strangely, pushing you away, and bitching you our at every chance he could get. Let's be real, he was bitching you out about your scarf, and even I can tell he's secretly hot for them. But, um... one of the suggested ways to save him for... Scott to give him the bite..." she revealed carefully.

[icame2win]

"I don't think he'd hesitate to kill Stiles if that was the only way of stopping the Nogitsune. I could be wrong, and I hope to hell I am, but there's just no way to know for sure. I can't even be around Allison anymore, unless the whole group is around. She's gotten so pushy, and Scott's my best friend. Even if I were interested in what she's packing, I wouldn't screw with her, because she dated Scott. It just doesn't really seem right. I don't know what she's doing, but it needs to stop, because we need to focus on Stiles right now. Fuck everything else." And it really was how he felt, too. Nothing else in the world mattered except Stiles and getting him back from the Nogitsune.

He leaned into Lydia's embrace, grateful for the comfort from his friend. "It... we wanted to keep it to ourselves as long as we could. We didn't want anyone to use us against each other. But when all that started, I just... I didn't know what to do. Honestly, I knew how much he liked the scarves..." There was a faint ghost of a smile. "That's why I have so many. But then even those seemed to make him mad at me, and he wouldn't chill out." He paused, shaking his head just a little. "I don't... I don't think Stiles would want that. I mean, it's better than being a Nogitsune, but... But Stiles is our humanity. He's the most real thing in the midst of everything, and I don't... I don't know how that would be."

[imsomething]

Lydia nodded slightly with a resolute sigh. "I think the people who wouldn't kill him to stop the Nogitsune are in the minority and lessening by the minute, considering the thing is a psychotic evil spirit doing things that make Stiles look like a psycho. But we know we won't give up on him. Yeah? Neither will Scott, neither will Sheriff Stilinski. All the rest, well, they kind of have a track record of being precarious in the protection stakes. Not that I can talk. I completely screwed up. Just when I thought I had this... thing somewhat figured out."

"You don't have to justify it to me, honey. Not even a bit. I think what you did is a good idea. It means you don't have to worry about people sticking their noses in and telling you why it's a terrible idea, and it gives you time to decide when you're ready for... whatever comes next if Stiles gets out of this alive." She fell quiet for a moment. "In all honesty, I'm jealous. My dating track record has been pretty bad. You got yourself a great guy there. But I do know that Scott comes as part of the Stiles package and if it comes down to Stiles dying or not dying, and the bite can save him... we all know what we would choose."

[icame2win]

"Lydia, you did the best you could. Nothing supernatural is perfect, and you know that. I mean, if it were, I wouldn't have been knocked out for so long before I started healing. My werewolf healing should've kicked in, but it just... it didn't. The only times I've ever known of it failing before involved wolfsbane and stuff like that... Not burns. But... You're right. We're not giving up on Stiles. I refuse to give up on him. I love him too much, and I'm not going to lose him before I even get the chance to tell him that." He paused, his eyes flooding with tears again, but this time with tears that he was able to at least hold some control over. "I never told him, Lydia. I love him, and I never told him."

Lydia was honestly one of Isaac's favorite people in the world. She had once been the stuck up rich bitch with no fucks to give about anyone but herself, but life had changed her, and she was one of the best friends that they had -- the only one who knew about him and Stiles. He gave a small shake of his head, and leaned into Lydia's comforting hug just a little bit more. "You know you mean the world to us, right? Stiles... Stiles always saw a side in you that no one else knew was there, and you proved him right. Ordinarily, I don't know if I'd be friends with the chick that my boyfriend was in love with for the better part of his post-puberty life, but... You're an amazing friend, and we're so lucky to have you. You... You're right. I'd rather him be alive and one of... of us, than..." He waved his hands in a circular motion in front of him, unable to get the words to come out.