Richie Morton Jameson (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
thankfuckforlife) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
muserevival2016-01-12 10:56 pm
thankfuckforlife) wrote in muserevival2016-01-12 10:56 pm
Entry tags:
113.4. Drabble
Life
When you were a doctor, you were reminded every day how fragile life could be. When you were a pediatrician, every day you hoped that wouldn't be one of those days. Children often seemed so resilient. It seemed to be adults who couldn't cope with shit. Children could carry the weight of the world on their shoulders with injury and illness, and still transform to a fantasy world dressed as Superman and let their imaginations run wild. Some grown adults were out there moping for weeks on end because of broken relationships, or getting pissed off that someone said something that offended them. They hold grudges, they judge, they bitch, they whine, they complain, and they moan.
Yet Richie could come to work to a kid terminal from neuroblastoma, who had the most gorgeous smile, the brightest stories to tell, and strength and courage to still keep fighting. There could be a child banged up and paralysed from a motor vehicle accident who would sing along to every word of the children's songs the nurses sung with them and get excited over a birthday cake with Buzz Lightyear on it. There could be a child scarred from burns who liked to dress up as a fairy princess every day and believe she was Elsa from Frozen. There could be a child who could no longer speak or hear from a brain infection who had the strength to try to tell his mom and dad he would be okay when they were the ones falling apart.
All this was why Richie did the job he did. But beyond all that, there were those days where you could be hit with such an incredible sense of loss and failure, that it felt like your whole world had been torn out from under you. The day started as normal as any, and it finished with him standing there trying to catch his breath, sweating, calling the time of death on a child who had seemed happy and well, readying for discharge, when the day started. The only worse thing than calling a time of death on a young child was having to tell their parents the horrific news.
The young girl, seven years old, was in for treatment of an infection. She presented with a high fever and they admitted her for IV antibiotics. The next day, the fever had abated and she had perked right up, but close to lunch time, she had complained of a headache and vomited. When the fever spiked again, Richie ordered some more tests and got on the phone to arrange for some scans. When he was on the phone, the little girl lost consciousness and started to have a seizure, going into cardiac arrest. A Code Blue was called and Richie responded. He could never see coming that he was about lose his patient. The team tried all they could, but she didn't make it.
Richie was numb. He felt sick. He wanted to cry. He did cry once the shock wore off, but only after he kept it together long enough to deliver the terrible news to the little girls parents. To make matters worst, she was an only child conceived by IVF. They hadn't been able to have another. They just wanted to know why. Over and over, they asked him why. The mother broke down, the father got angry and nearly punched Richie for being a failure. Security were called and he was pulled away, Nathan, his supervisor, taking over with the parents instead. To make matters worse, it looked like it was suspected meningitis and because they couldn't confirm the cause of death until autopsy, all those exposed to her within the prior ten days would have to be treated with prophylaxis antibiotics, Richie included.
His mom had a special date, so he didn't bother her. His boyfriend was held back at work, so he didn't bother him either. He caught a cab home to the small apartment he shared with his best friend (at least, he assumed they were still best friend, though he couldn't quite be sure anymore), crawled into bed in his clothes and broke down in tears that felt like they would never stop. For that moment, he couldn't remember a single reason why he chose to become a pediatrician.
= Richie Jameson =
original character
When you were a doctor, you were reminded every day how fragile life could be. When you were a pediatrician, every day you hoped that wouldn't be one of those days. Children often seemed so resilient. It seemed to be adults who couldn't cope with shit. Children could carry the weight of the world on their shoulders with injury and illness, and still transform to a fantasy world dressed as Superman and let their imaginations run wild. Some grown adults were out there moping for weeks on end because of broken relationships, or getting pissed off that someone said something that offended them. They hold grudges, they judge, they bitch, they whine, they complain, and they moan.
Yet Richie could come to work to a kid terminal from neuroblastoma, who had the most gorgeous smile, the brightest stories to tell, and strength and courage to still keep fighting. There could be a child banged up and paralysed from a motor vehicle accident who would sing along to every word of the children's songs the nurses sung with them and get excited over a birthday cake with Buzz Lightyear on it. There could be a child scarred from burns who liked to dress up as a fairy princess every day and believe she was Elsa from Frozen. There could be a child who could no longer speak or hear from a brain infection who had the strength to try to tell his mom and dad he would be okay when they were the ones falling apart.
All this was why Richie did the job he did. But beyond all that, there were those days where you could be hit with such an incredible sense of loss and failure, that it felt like your whole world had been torn out from under you. The day started as normal as any, and it finished with him standing there trying to catch his breath, sweating, calling the time of death on a child who had seemed happy and well, readying for discharge, when the day started. The only worse thing than calling a time of death on a young child was having to tell their parents the horrific news.
The young girl, seven years old, was in for treatment of an infection. She presented with a high fever and they admitted her for IV antibiotics. The next day, the fever had abated and she had perked right up, but close to lunch time, she had complained of a headache and vomited. When the fever spiked again, Richie ordered some more tests and got on the phone to arrange for some scans. When he was on the phone, the little girl lost consciousness and started to have a seizure, going into cardiac arrest. A Code Blue was called and Richie responded. He could never see coming that he was about lose his patient. The team tried all they could, but she didn't make it.
Richie was numb. He felt sick. He wanted to cry. He did cry once the shock wore off, but only after he kept it together long enough to deliver the terrible news to the little girls parents. To make matters worst, she was an only child conceived by IVF. They hadn't been able to have another. They just wanted to know why. Over and over, they asked him why. The mother broke down, the father got angry and nearly punched Richie for being a failure. Security were called and he was pulled away, Nathan, his supervisor, taking over with the parents instead. To make matters worse, it looked like it was suspected meningitis and because they couldn't confirm the cause of death until autopsy, all those exposed to her within the prior ten days would have to be treated with prophylaxis antibiotics, Richie included.
His mom had a special date, so he didn't bother her. His boyfriend was held back at work, so he didn't bother him either. He caught a cab home to the small apartment he shared with his best friend (at least, he assumed they were still best friend, though he couldn't quite be sure anymore), crawled into bed in his clothes and broke down in tears that felt like they would never stop. For that moment, he couldn't remember a single reason why he chose to become a pediatrician.
original character