099.5 Ten things

[notmyfathersson]

Ten things that make you laugh

1. The funny sleeping positions my other half gets into
2. My brother and his fiance teasing each other
3. Old Adam Sandler movies, before he made all the stupid ones
4. The video going around Facebook of Carlton dancing to MMMBop
5. The other half and his brother arguing over the last bite of a piece of cake when we had dinner last weekend.
6. The other half insisting it wasn't his birthday when I told him Happy Birthday this morning.
7. When farts happen at inappropriate times
8. People who keep spending money to see the same damn superhero movie with different actors every 5 years.
9. Kids swearing... probably mostly because I don't have kids of my own.
10. The memory of catching Alex in the shower singing "I Will Survive" into a shampoo bottle when he thought I was still sleeping

Travis Parker-Cleary, original character

Comments

[radioactivesadness]

Farts? Seriously?

[notmyfathersson]

Farts, yes. But never seriously. :P Life is at its ultimate worst when you can't even have a good laugh at a fart.

[radioactivesadness]

You sound like you're tapping into Billy's brain. He literally gave me a laminated Licence to Fart.

[notmyfathersson]

That's true love, little brother. If I had any doubt's you'd found the right guy, they have just been obliterated.

[radioactivesadness]

I'm pretty sure I had no idea what to say at the time.

[notmyfathersson]

Was this before or after he asked you to marry him?

[radioactivesadness]

Way before. It was when I got sick and was having all those problems. And, you know, hiding everything ever.

[notmyfathersson]

Never not loving Billy for being there and trying to help you remember how to laugh when you didn't feel like laughing.

[radioactivesadness]

He saved my life. Not just in a metaphorical sense.

[itsrainingmen]

10. That never happened

7. Only my brother would fart in the middle of Dead Poets Society

4. I need a link, stat.

[notmyfathersson]

10. Lies. It totally did, and you can't deny it. The only reason there isn't video evidence is because I love you.

7. During the "O Captain, my captain" scene of all things.

4. https://www.facebook.com/MayhemNiteclub/videos/10154086900281110/ You're welcome.

[itsrainingmen]

No evidence, it didn't happen :P

I am never going to get him a boyfriend.

Oh fuck, I can't stop laughing.

[notmyfathersson]

So the hot sex we had in the shower after you realized you'd been caught didn't happen, either?

Maybe he needs a boyfriend who enjoys flatulence as much as he does?

Seriously! It made my entire week. Well, that video, and that thing you did with your tongue last night.

[itsrainingmen]

Ah, but did it? :P

He's got his eye an Italian. Though, being Jeff, it could go either way.

How am I going to get through my rounds with a straight face today?

[notmyfathersson]

If memory serves, it happened in the shower... and then again in the bedroom afterward.

Go either way in what way? He could rock it or totally blow it? LOL.

You're not. Mission accomplished. :P

[itsrainingmen]

I think your memory is patchy :P

Yep. But I know the guy's he's crushing on and he doesn't seem like a prude or a wilting flower who can't handle something like talking about farts without getting offended.

It could be worse. I could be working the ICU.

[notmyfathersson]

Not when it comes to you, gorgeous.

Well, that's a good thing, then. Because if he were a prude, he wouldn't last long with your darling brother in the mix.

Oh, crap. That would be fail.

[halfwaytoheaven]

You have to admit, deliberate farts on people are also hilarious.

[notmyfathersson]

Ah, this is true. They very much are. I haven't pulled that on the other half, though.

[halfwaytoheaven]

Tell me you at least pulled it on your brother. That's, like, brotherly initiation.

[notmyfathersson]

Haven't ripped one directly on him, but waited until we were all settled watching a movie and sent one flying his way.

[halfwaytoheaven]

I bet he was shocked. He's the shy type.

[notmyfathersson]

He was. It was priceless. He just gave me this wide-eyed look, and then his other half lost his shit laughing.

[halfwaytoheaven]

That would be because Billy has just been through chemo and is probably an A-Class Champion Farter.

[notmyfathersson]

If ABBA had a song called "Farting Queen" instead of "Dancing Queen" I'd be giving Billy the crown.