099.5 Ten things

[notmyfathersson]

Ten things that make you laugh

1. The funny sleeping positions my other half gets into
2. My brother and his fiance teasing each other
3. Old Adam Sandler movies, before he made all the stupid ones
4. The video going around Facebook of Carlton dancing to MMMBop
5. The other half and his brother arguing over the last bite of a piece of cake when we had dinner last weekend.
6. The other half insisting it wasn't his birthday when I told him Happy Birthday this morning.
7. When farts happen at inappropriate times
8. People who keep spending money to see the same damn superhero movie with different actors every 5 years.
9. Kids swearing... probably mostly because I don't have kids of my own.
10. The memory of catching Alex in the shower singing "I Will Survive" into a shampoo bottle when he thought I was still sleeping

Travis Parker-Cleary, original character

Comments

[radioactivesadness]

I asked my therapist about that sort of stuff. He said it's likely I still would've fallen ill. Dad has a lot of guilt about it all. I seem to kind of miss the little brother mojo mark.

[notmyfathersson]

I realize it's a lot more complicated than something that just having me there or your dad being more aware would've fixed. It wouldn't have changed how your mom and sister treated you. Hey, I'm not exactly the perfect big brother, either. We're learning this together. It kind of works out because we're both sort of new at the whole thing.

[radioactivesadness]

I talked to Dad a lot on this trip. He's pretty sure Candy isn't his. That my mother just said she was because of his money. I guess the resentment makes sense with that. I'm just really, um... I guess reserved.

[notmyfathersson]

The way it sounds like your mom is, I can't say I'm really surprised. She sounds pretty terrible. I don't mind that you're reserved. When I was a kid, dreaming of having a little brother, honestly, what I really wanted was someone that I could trust and talk to... and that sort of be the protector of. My dreams hardly revolved around farting contests. You're special to me because you're my little brother. Other people's ideas of what that means don't matter.

[radioactivesadness]

She just didn't care. She never did. She never wanted another kid, and Dad's admitted to me he was high when she got pregnant. Which is... you know, no wonder I have issues, right? Can't say I blame him for needing to be high, though. I just look at other people with their brothers and sisters and feel like I'm not good enough.

[notmyfathersson]

I think I'd have to be high all the time around her. She just sounds terrible. Listen, kiddo. You're way more than good enough. I'm glad that you're my brother. I know that your mind tells you you're not good enough for a lot of things. But I can tell you you're a good brother.

[radioactivesadness]

Dad was in his prime in the 60s and 70s, so he was probably high all the time anyway. Sofie thinks it's why he had the stroke. I'm still learning that I'm good anything, I guess.

[notmyfathersson]

I'm kind of glad we didn't know Dad back then. That could be true. Drugs are hard as fuck on your body. You're learning, though. That's a start.

[radioactivesadness]

It was the done thing to do back then. I'm not any less proud to be his son. He's openly and honestly told me this stuff about him over the years. I think in a sense to try to get me know I was never an accident for him. He was always so happy to have a son. And now he has two.

[notmyfathersson]

I'm not, either. He's a good person, and he loves the hell out of both of us. When we first met, he never once questioned me about if I just wanted his money or anything, which is kind of what I was terrified he'd think about me.

[radioactivesadness]

After Candy, he probably wouldn't have been surprised if you did. But he also isn't the sort to pre-judge anyone. He never did with Billy. He just sort of adopted him from the get-go.

[notmyfathersson]

I feel really lucky to have him as my dad. My other dad is really great, too. Is it weird that I want you to meet him and my mom?

[radioactivesadness]

He's an amazing dad, which I think was another thing that pissed them off. We were close. At least, we were until I started to get ill and he was quite incapacitated at the time. It's only through a whole pile of home nursing and physical therapy he regained some of his mobility back.

[notmyfathersson]

For fuck's sake, you needed someone you could be close to with the way they treated you. You were as far as he knew, his only son. Of course you'd be close to him.

[radioactivesadness]

Yeah, it was just... psychological abuse, I think the therapist called it. I was always just in the way, like I shouldn't exist. It was hard when dad was too sick to be even able to speak. He's still kind of slow with it now. Candy calls him her retard father.

[notmyfathersson]

Sounds like it. In a serious sort of way. So they were abusing you, and Dad couldn't step in because he was too sick. Fuck, if they were men, I'd fuck them both up. Seriously? I hate her and I've only ever met her the once.

[radioactivesadness]

Dad never knew. Still doesn't. I don't think.

[notmyfathersson]

Never knew what they were doing to you?

[radioactivesadness]

Yeah. He knew there was sibling rivalry but he just assumed it was because I was so different to Candy.

[notmyfathersson]

Different in that she's a cunt, and you're not?