097.5. Ten Things

[alittletoolegal]

Ten early memories of someone you love

1. Regret, regret and more regret... albeit, bittersweet
2. Extensive urges to issue grievous bodily harm via bitchslaps
3. Ripped jeans and cowboy boots
4. Bitchslap urges turning into urges to thump him
5. Sex too incredible for its own good
6. Desire to slam said cock into a door
7. Letting him be the seed of my self-doubt
8. He was the only person who could ever drive me crazy
9. Wondering if it was petty to send him a bill for a pregnancy test and abortion
10. Moot pointing all of the above when we procreated

Dani Lorenzi
~ original character ~

Comments

[themightyfallinlove]

A guy who's terrified of ending up like Mark someday and having my kid show up on my doorstep after I missed everything. With the way I used to be, that could happen. We both know that I wasn't exactly the most chaste dude back in the day. I know it's not my decision, and I don't have any right to tell you what you should or shouldn't do with your son. I just know that if this guy has two cents worth of decency, and found out about your son down the road, he'd hate that he missed so damn much.

[alittletoolegal]

Do you want a standing ovation for that speech?

[themightyfallinlove]

No. I want to know if Benny's my son.

[alittletoolegal]

What makes you ask that?

[themightyfallinlove]

Math, mostly. I don't know exactly when he was born, but based on his age, it would line up. And the fact that we were classmates and I thought friends all the way through school, but after we slept together, and we graduated, you disappeared. If you'd been pregnant then, there's no way I could've known. And because if he's mine, I don't want him to grow up without his dad. I swore if I ever had kids, they would know me as a constant part of their lives.

[alittletoolegal]

Are you saying I can't raise my son on my own? Fuck you.

[themightyfallinlove]

No. I'm not saying that at all. You've done a pretty damn good job of raising him so far from what I'm hearing. This doesn't have anything to do with his your skills as a parent. It has to do with me wanting to know if he's mind, and him knowing who his dad is. If it is me.

[alittletoolegal]

A "pretty damn good job". Fuck's sake, you shit me.

[themightyfallinlove]

Jesus Christ, Dani, I'm not judging you or how you're doing raising your son. From what I've heard just from people in the office who've seen or met him, he's a fantastic kid, and you're an incredible mother. Not that I ever would've thought you'd be a bad one. What am I doing or saying that's so wrong? I asked a valid question. That's all.

Or is the validity of the question why you're not answering me, and instead just accusing me of thinking you're a shitty mother? Because I work with kids raised by shitty mothers. I see the shitty mothers every day. You're not a shitty mother. Not even close. You don't have it in you.

[alittletoolegal]

He's your son. And I will chop your cock off with a hacksaw if you try to get custody of him.

[themightyfallinlove]

I wouldn't do that to you. I swear, Dani. I wouldn't. I just want to know him. I want to be his dad. You've raised him all by yourself thus far, and I know if our paths hadn't crossed again, you would've done just as fantastic a job raising him without me to adulthood. I know you guys don't need me. But I want to be a part of his life and spend time with him. I don't want his dad to be some guy in a story that his mom cared about, but who never showed up to know about him. I want to spend time with him and not just be a birthday card every three or four years. But I would never, under any circumstances, dream of trying to take him away from you.

[alittletoolegal]

I've not raised him to think a mother and a father is inevitable for every family like some people do. He doesn't know he's missing anything from his life, and that's all I've wanted for him. It's going to be an all or nothing thing, and if you fuck him over, I will fuck you up.

[themightyfallinlove]

I wouldn't know my dad if he walked through the door right now. I didn't want that for my kids if I ever had them. I won't fuck him over. If you'd told me back then, I wouldn't have fucked you guys over then, either. I don't blame you, and I understand why you didn't. I can't make up the time I lost with him, but I can hope like hell to have a long future of getting to be his dad.

[alittletoolegal]

It was a mistake. I chose to wear it. He's not a mistake anymore. None of this is about you or me or what we want anymore. It's about him. My whole life has been about him since I knew he existed.

[themightyfallinlove]

I don't presume to know what I'm doing. But I know that I'm not going to sit around with my thumb in my ass expecting someone else to figure it out for me. I am going to need your help, though. You know him. You've had him every day since before you even knew about him. You've been his mom since day one. You know his favorite bedtime story, and his favorite toys. I'm not too proud to admit I'm going to need your help if I have a hope in hell of getting this right.

[alittletoolegal]

How he responds to you is completely up to him, not me. It's about what you do to connect with him.

[themightyfallinlove]

When can I meet him?

[alittletoolegal]

It will have to be late tomorrow at the earliest. I have to meet a new child client tomorrow. I need to start working to expedite his case, which means pressuring social services.

[themightyfallinlove]

That's always a rough go of things, but you've had tons of experience at putting pressure on social services. You're one of the best in the business at that. Late tomorrow is fine with me if it's okay with you.

[alittletoolegal]

There is nothing more distressing to a child than being in the system. The sooner they're out, the better. I'll let you know when I'm done.

[themightyfallinlove]

Getting passed from family to family with no guarantee that they'll look after you like they should. That's pretty shitty. How old is the kiddo you're working with? Sounds good. Thank you, Dani. For telling me the truth and for giving me the chance to know him.

[alittletoolegal]

He's 2 years old and he's been in 3 different foster homes in six months. A chance, yes. I'll stop if it you screw up. I'm not letting anyone hurt him.

[themightyfallinlove]

Christ. There's no way to get a foothold when they're moving you like that and you don't know which way is up. So what is the goal of the case? To get him settled? Back to the parents? I know you will. But I don't intend to to hurt him. I want to protect him just like you do.

[alittletoolegal]

He's too young to understand. He just knows he keeps getting left with strangers. There's health issues and abuse that's made him a difficult case. No, his biological father is dead from a drug overdose and his mother is in prison for drug dealing and prostitution. We want the parental rights severed so he can be adopted.

[themightyfallinlove]

That's terrible. I know we see it in our work nearly every day, but it never stops breaking your heart for the little guys and gals going through it. Fuck me, so he's just had one rough go of it after another. If she's in prison for drugs and prostitution, it will probably be ages before she's out. Is she the one who was abusing him?